Frances Bean Knows everything

September 20, 2009

Why I hate motherhood

Filed under: rants, Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , — Frances Locke @ 10:49 AM


misc moms


Let me start off by saying that I love my kids. I do! Even when they puke on me, and embarrass me in public, or give me stretch marks, I love them. But I hate motherhood. Or rather I hate all the annoying fuss that comes with it. I cringe at the words “play date” and “attachment parenting”. I hate feeling obligated to have random pointless conversations with the mommy warriors at the park. In fact, I rarely went to the park until I moved not too long ago.


Everything I hate about motherhood can be summed up in my abhorrence of “mommy blogs”. I hate mom blogs. Scratch that, I LOATHE mom blogs. If I see one more “clever” woman refer to her children as “sweets”, or their husbands as “hubbs” I think I will puke. Ladies, you aren’t the first woman to think of these cutesy nicknames, and it isn’t endearing. I promise you.


Mom blogs characterize everything that is wrong with motherhood in America. Catty middle class white women arguing over who breastfed the longest, or had the most hardcore attachment parenting technique. Now don’t get me wrong. I’m a mother, and a white woman, if not quite middle class. But I am not delusional enough to believe that not only are my children fascinating to every single person on the internet, but that in fact I, Frances, have the key to unlock the secrets of parenting.


I’m sorry, but your adventures in nanny hunting or getting little Bratleigh into the best pre-school just aren’t that interesting to anyone other than other self-centered, delusional mommy bloggers.


But I digress. I wish someone had warned me about how soul crushing motherhood can be. The most frustrating part of being a parent (and I think being a mother especially) is the constant intrusion from the outside world. I wish I could run away to Siberia sometimes, with my kids, and not have to deal with pushy agenda-moms drilling their organic food dogma into my scull, or some nosy grandmotherly type on the subway telling me my daughter’s coat isn’t zipped up all the way. “She must be freezing!”


 It doesn’t take a village to raise my children. I will raise my kids, and anyone who doesn’t like how I do it can take a hike. Everyone has an opinion about child rearing. Whether it’s the weirdo granola head teacher at my daughter’s school, my childless college age female relatives, or the neighborhood crack head who lost her kid to CPS because she couldn’t put down the pipe long enough to change a few diapers. Everyone thinks they know how to parent better than anyone else. Maybe they should all get together and start a mom blog!



  1. A-fucking-men!

    I was lamenting the other day that I wish I hadn’t referred to my husband “Hubby” on my blog, it is so damned cliche. But, my blog is about as far from a mommy blog as you can get, so I guess I’m safe from total scrutiny 😉


    Comment by sexie sadie — September 25, 2009 @ 5:12 PM

    • It only bugs me when I see it from these mom bloggers who pretend like their only meaning for breathing is their “hubby” and their kids. Blech. Your blog is the farthest thing from that, which is why I love it!

      Comment by Frances Bean — September 25, 2009 @ 5:23 PM

  2. Bravo! Cannot agree with you more, can’t stand playgrounds, fundraisers, ballet and mommy sickening stories. I wish there was more women like us out there. Get real, people!

    Comment by Anna — June 8, 2010 @ 12:44 AM

  3. Motherhood is ‘soul crushing’… definitely support that notion 100%. Really appreciate your candidness on this blog:)

    Comment by i agree — November 14, 2010 @ 10:32 PM

  4. Love your comments re wretched mommy blows & other icky aspects of mom culture. Totally agree!

    Comment by lelakay — April 15, 2011 @ 1:46 PM

  5. So glad to read this…I googled “I hate mommy blogs” because I needed to know there were people out there writing about it because they just drive me crazy. And fascinate me. In that disgusting reality tv show kind of way. Not brave enough to write about it on my own blog yet though, so brava to you!

    Comment by Becca — May 22, 2011 @ 10:15 PM

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